How much work is enough?
Note #2 from a Principal
Welcome back.
Each week, I share one honest reflection from life inside school leadership — to help you lead others without losing yourself.
Today’s note is about something I’ve struggled with more than once: when work slowly becomes identity, and the line between who you are and what you do starts to blur.
When Work Becomes Who You Are — and the Line Between Life and Leadership Disappears
In today’s always-on world, the boundary between work and life keeps getting thinner.
For principals and assistant principals — who carry constant responsibility and urgent questions — it’s especially hard to know where the job ends and the person begins.
Even when the weekend arrives, or the workday is “over,” the work continues: in the emails waiting for replies, in the thoughts spinning about tomorrow’s problems, and in the phone that never quite stops buzzing.
But what happens when work isn’t just what we do — it becomes who we are?
Work as Identity
For many of us, being a principal isn’t just a job. It’s meaning. It’s service. It’s personal.
We don’t just say “I work as a principal.”
We say: “I am a principal.”
Our role becomes a part of our self-image — our pride, our struggle, our sense of worth.
That’s not wrong. But it’s risky.
When work becomes identity, every undone task can feel like personal failure.
When everything is one click away, it becomes harder to know the difference between “I’m working” and “I am.”
When Work Never Ends
A report from Karolinska Institutet in Sweden — focused on shift workers — highlights how poor recovery, irregular hours, and lack of rest affect sleep, health, and safety. It’s just as relevant for principals:
https://ki.se/media/268949/download?utm_source=chatgpt.com
Interrupted recovery: Without clear boundaries, rest becomes fragmented. Tired becomes normal.
Decreased clarity: Lack of sleep and downtime chips away at decision-making and conflict resolution.
Balance becomes an illusion: We’re not really “at work,” but never fully “off,” either.
Questions to Explore
Why is it so easy to let work become identity? Is it about feeling valuable — or because work offers structure that life sometimes lacks?
How does constant connection affect our ability to disconnect?
What happens to our well-being when we never draw a line between effort and rest?
Culture Matters
Maybe part of the problem is cultural.
The expectation to always be reachable, improving, delivering — especially in leadership — makes letting go feel impossible.
In that context, to pause and reflect becomes almost radical.
So what does it mean to set boundaries when the job lives in your identity?
And is it possible to define ourselves as principals — without losing the rest of who we are?
Let me know if it lands with you.
And feel free to share it with someone else who might be carrying a little too much right now.